|
THE ENEMY WITHIN OURSELVES
Do
you remember the day when you were told of your diagnosis? Do
remember how it felt? Do remember all the emotions and bewilderment
that quickly filled your mind? Of course you do and I doubt that
you shall ever forget it. I doubt that I will ever forget that day
either. How odd it felt to be on the other side of the exam room
being the patient instead of the doctor. I had given this type of
news to many patients while I wore that white coat, but on this day
my white coat was home hanging in the closet.
That was the day our lives changed so drastically and would never be
the same. Our hopes, our dreams, and our future aspirations
suddenly stopped at an idle. We had just been given a label which
would dictate much of what was to come in our future. And, like
most labels, this one came with a set of unique instructions!
Simply stated those instructions were, “You can’t change or control
it, or ever hope for it to improve, in fact it is only going to get
worse. You must learn to accept it!” The doom and gloom, the
reality of our plight, had been thrust upon us that fateful day. We
found ourselves suddenly stripped of our life’s dreams and
aspirations. Dazed and depressed we began the process of coping
with our new label and the controlling instructions.
Thus, we are controlled by our label. Whether it be our own
thoughts, another person out in public who may think “it’s just a
bit too early in the day to have been drinking that much”, our
family and friends advice or warnings, or in the instructions we
receive from the medical community, we have changed our behavior to
fit the label. Our ambitions, careers and goals gradually faded
into oblivion as we have been forced into the constraints of the
label. Some of us gave up. Why?
Some gave up because of the doom and gloom storyline of the reality
of the degenerative process we must live with. In addition, we are
told that we cannot change the reality of the disease process so we
have learned to merely accept “the facts” and have tried to “cope
with it”. It’s that simple. The power of suggestion, and the word
of someone else (especially if they are an authority figure), can
often be very compelling. It is within this regard that we have
come to harbor the darkness of the diagnosis – degenerative,
symptoms will get worse, no cure, no treatment and nothing anyone
can do – and then allowed that labeling darkness to hold too much
control.
This defining labeling diagnosis haunts us every day of our lives
and is draped around our necks as if displayed for all to read. We
define too much of ourselves by it. This label we have accepted has
forced us to modify most everything about ourselves and it is what
has shaped our lives into what they are today. Good or bad, right
or wrong, we are all controlled to some degree by what we interpret
this label to be. And what becomes the sham for many of us is that
we have allowed the opinions of others to dictate what we think and
do without considering other possible alternatives. In that regard,
we have simply accepted too much, sometimes surrendered and have not
allowed ourselves to explore our own possible potential.
This is a tough reality for many of us to overcome. This label
proves to be a monster to deal with has become nearly impossible to
see beyond in hopes of finding something different. Everyday it
seems to rear its ugly head and remind us of our place, our
limitations and we are forced to live the label. There seems to be
no escape and we succumb to what our perceived reality dictates to
us.
However, I think we can change the way we think and we can change
our attitude. We have the ability to change our passive mindset and
begin to help ourselves out of the pity wagon. I’m included in all
the above and live it just like you. It feels like something has
been ripped from our very soul, and so it has. Some of our normal,
some of our pride, dignity and self respect was stolen as we became
powerless to prevent the theft. In disbelief, we observed the
process as if it were happening to someone else – we became
powerless. Nothing in our lives could have prepared us for what we
now face. When does it get easier? What can I hope for? Who can
make this better? You know the answers. Yes, I think you really
do. And, even more, I think you also harbor the best form of
treatment available today. Look within yourself. What can you do
to help yourself better cope with our reality? That is where you
must begin!
Much of our life admittedly will never again be in our control.
However, I think we have relinquished too much control to our
label. I also think that it is high time we fight to regain some of
that control. And how do we do that? I have found that the best
way for me to regain more control into my life is by relearning how
to safely and confidently move again. What a profound difference I
feel and see everyday, and many of you can achieve the same for
yourselves.
Today, start to believe in yourself!
Today, start to take some control and responsibility for
yourself.
Today, start to reshape your future and the possibilities you
possess.
Live your life for yourself with a challenge to do what you can to
improve your capabilities. Take some responsibility upon yourself
and begin to think outside of the box of the label. You don’t
necessarily have to live as you do. You have choices.
A
quote from an old movie continues to help me stay focused. A
soldier had become blinded by shrapnel during a battle. On his
return home, and readjusting to his new life, he found that everyone
treated him as if he couldn’t manage many things by himself
anymore. After all, he was blind and therefore….different. His new
label changed how everyone else in the community viewed his
capabilities. Many of them intuitively knew what was best for him;
many of them viewed him as a burden. They continued to instruct him
on his limitations, what he couldn’t do anymore and what he
ultimately had to accept.
However, he didn’t listen to them very well and continued to tell
those who would listen of his dreams and ambitions. He continued to
tell them what he wanted to do regardless of being blind; and many
attempted to dissuade him. Frustrated by his wrongful dreams,
fearing for his safety, and lovingly knowing that he was filled with
false hopes, his fiancée finally pleaded, “Why do you insist on
wanting to do things you know you can’t do?” He replied,
“Because I won’t know what I can’t do until I try!”
Get
the point? We live in the same world as that soldier. People are
constantly reminding us of what we can’t or shouldn’t be doing. And
what is worse, we do the same thing to ourselves. We often limit
what we do in the same way. Sometimes it is warranted, however,
there are plenty of times when it is not. Then the troubling
reality sets in as time marches on. When do we really know which
thought process we are listening to? Is it the truism that we
really shouldn’t be doing “that” because of our condition, or are we
accepting excuses and inhibitions that we shouldn’t without really
knowing? Sadly, it is a combination of both surrounded by the many
fears we hide within.
We
have to break that cycle; you have to know the truth. I will make
this pledge to each of you. With few exceptions, every one of you
has the ability to improve your movement skills. Are you up for the
challenge? Are you willing to allow yourself to try?
|
